unlike advance themselves, Jimmy Kimmel He’s no longer live on stage in New York City today for the first time since 2019. Having Tested positive for Covid again، DisneyCEOs, stream dreams and shows old and new.
While not appearing in person at City Basketball at Pier 36 at the end of the tail CEO Bob Chapek introduced Showcasing full bells and whistles by the brassy House of Mouse and top-notch talent, the proteus Kimmel was still in good shape and fiery after two years of hypothetical roasting caused by the pandemic. “We don’t reject you, we tell you stories,” he stated after tearing Disney’s, “arrogant bastards” into Netflix And all their common competitors. “Just remember this, this company owns it all. We own Mickey Mouse, we own Spider-Man, we own the Muppets, the Simpsons, the Kardashians, incanto. We own it all! “
“We have enough strength to build the Death Star – which is another thing we have!”
Even by his admittedly high standards, this year’s roughly 15-minute routine had something for everyone and it accommodated everyone, perhaps even more than before—and a slap or two, if you know what I mean.
Here are some of Kimmel’s best afternoon niggers Zoomed-in:
The Disney CEO has never spoken openly before and now we know why. Bob, I think I speak for all of us when I say, “We can’t wait to see you Ji Jin 2. “
Disney has been very committed to being inclusive and culturally sensitive since…everyone started getting mad at us because we didn’t. But what do you expect? We are 100 years old. This company is a hundred years old. It’s our 100th anniversary, and we’ll celebrate this milestone just like Disney – by drawing living things out of it! “100 Years of Wonders.” Isn’t this the show? Fred Savage has been kicked out last week?
Many people wonder how we will keep Unmarried A new franchise – and the answer is very simple: we are not. We’ll keep doing the same shit until everyone has herpes.
How about those f*ckers in Fox yesterday? Two years after telling everyone that Covid is a hoax, they trick you into taking an Uber to watch a tape! Can they do that? And most importantly, why didn’t we do that?
Every year I say, “F*ck Netflix.” This year it’s come true I have to admit, after watching these arrogant bastards choke the life out of us for years, it’s really nice to see them Regression to sell advertising.
The only sad thing about the end this is us they were Winter Olympics Rankings. NBC paid out nearly $8 billion – for what turned out to be the lowest-rated Olympics ever. Surprisingly, viewers didn’t think watching skaters jump in the shadow of an abandoned nuclear power plant was the happy story of the year.
They are restarting Quantum leap And Night court. This is not so Autumn schedule. These are the tapes you find on your deceased uncle’s video recorders.
We don’t have an Olympiad. Young Sheldon Or 14 shows about Chicago – but do you know what we’ve got? Nathan f*cking Fillion.
Fox didn’t bother to release yesterday’s fall schedule. Which makes no sense. Why so in advance? Like, what if CBS decided not to release the fall schedule? If there is no timetable for fall, how do we know it Blue blood Still on the air? He is, thank God. CBS Renewal Blue blood – Also known as Magnum Pee frequently – for another 18 seasons. Along with all their other old shows for seniors.
TV and Broadcasting Network
Let’s be honest: our days are numbered. Of course the streamers are crushing on us. We are a fax machine five years after they invented email. What we’re seeing now on TV is what a horse felt the first time he saw a Model T. You know what ABC’s big plan is to win back viewers? To invite Will Smith to next year’s Oscars — and let him talk to anyone he wants. What else can we do? There are plenty of advantages to competing with Disney Plus, Hulu Plus, Paramount Plus, Discovery Plus, and Apple TV Plus – it’s Plusterf*ck there.
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